Why I chose a home birth after a difficult first birth
I believe every birth leaves its mark. Some are gentle and fulfilling, others need time to heal. My first birth wasn't a pleasant experience. It was a typical hospital birth, accompanied by a lot of control, little trust, an epidural, and ultimately, a vacuum extraction. I felt small, overwhelmed, and controlled by others. It took a long time for me to process and come to terms with this birth experience. For a long time, precisely because of this, I didn't want a second child.
When I became pregnant again, I quickly knew: This time I wanted it to be different. My first birth in the hospital had left its mark. I wanted a birth that was mine, self-determined and at my own pace. That's why I opted for a home birth. Actually, the desire for it had been there from the beginning, somewhere deep inside me, but for a long time I didn't dare to voice it. But at some point, it became clear: A home birth was the right path for me.
Of course, many people around me reacted critically: "What if something happens?" "Isn't a home birth dangerous?" I'm familiar with all these questions about safety during a home birth, and I've asked myself the same questions. But I did my research, read personal accounts, spoke with midwives, thoroughly informed myself about the risks and benefits, and exchanged experiences with other mothers who had also had home births. I prepared myself and strengthened my resolve until I felt I could refute all the objections for myself and my family.
Giving birth at my own pace – self-determined and safe at home
The birth began powerfully with strong contractions. I woke up in the night with the first contractions and knew immediately: today is the day. It was everything I had wished for: no hectic trip to the hospital, no harsh hospital lights, no feeling of "I have to function now." Instead, I was at home in familiar surroundings, where I could set the pace.
I moved freely, ate when I wanted, soaked in warm water, lay in bed, or sat on the floor. I cried, laughed, and breathed—all intuitively. My husband was with me, and my midwife supported me calmly and unobtrusively. No one told me what to do. I was simply allowed to be myself and give birth to my child in the way that felt best for me.
Home birth as a powerful and healing experience
When our son was born, everything felt like it was in slow motion. I held him in my arms, smelled his head, felt our daughter sitting beside us, quietly marveling. It wasn't a movie birth, but loud, intense, physical – and that's precisely why it was so healing, beautiful, and powerful. Above all, it was my birth experience.
A few final thoughts on self-determined birth
I'm not sharing my home birth story because I believe every birth should take place at home. Rather, I'm firmly convinced that every woman has the right to give birth autonomously and to shape her birth experience as she wishes. That it's okay and important to be fully informed, to prepare, to seek support, and to listen to your own intuition.
My home birth helped me regain my strength. And I wish for every woman that she is not diminished during her own birth, but allowed to blossom. 🌸
Yours, Lisa ( @ lisaxbeyer on Instagram)
PS After that powerful, incredibly intimate home birth, I knew one thing for sure: I wanted to continue carrying my baby close to me, just as he was born. The Rookie baby carrier made that possible: closeness, security, and ease during the postpartum period. For me, it's an absolute must-have, even with my second baby.
